Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales
by Agi
Summary: Disgruntled fairy tales performed by the YYH gang. I'M ALIVE! Which also means...NEW CHAPTER! :D
1. Introduction

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 1: **   
  
Intro A.K.A. Taming of the Cast   
  
  
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** Disclaimer: **   
  
I don't own anything. Please don't sue me...I live in a Chinese take-out box in the middle of a puddle. Don't take away all I have going for me...   
  
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Agi: *runs around screaming*   
  
Yusuke: What's her problem??   
  
Kurama: I think she's happy that she's finally writing fics again...not like that's a good thing...   
  
Hiei: Run for your lives...   
  
Agi: Yessssss....run my pretties...you won't escape...FOR THERE ARE NO DOORS HERE!!! MWAHAHA!!   
  
All: O.o   
  
Yusuke: No doors? Then how did we all get in here? There's got to be an exit around here somewhere...   
  
Kurama: *looks under a rug*   
  
Hiei: *looks behind a potted plant*   
  
Kuwabara: *ties his shoe*   
  
Karasu: Hi.   
  
Kurama: *shrieks*   
  
Agi: AAH! Where the hell did you come from?! I thought I had this whole place sealed off...   
  
Karasu: *points to a door labelled: "THIS IS NOT A DOOR. GO AWAY."*   
  
Kuwabara: *looks over* Hey guys, don't bother looking over there. That sign says that's not a door.   
  
All: -.-;;;;;   
  
Agi: *points at Karasu* Where were you on the night of October 46th 1805?!   
  
Karasu: Umm......at.......the zoo?   
  
Agi: And how do you explain the murder of poor Mr. Jingles? HMM?!   
  
Karasu: It was Miss Scarlet in the kitchen with the pogo stick.   
  
Agi: AH-HA! So you're the one who stole the mayonnaise!!   
  
Karasu: No.   
  
Kuwabara: Did I miss something?   
  
Agi: Well, if you didn't steal the mayonnaise, I guess it just ran away. So...wanna join us in poorly recreating a few fairytales?   
  
Karasu: Anything to be with my Kurama...   
  
Kurama: O.O;;;;;; *hides under a floorboard*   
  
Agi: Okie POKIE. *adds Karasu to the cast*   
  
Yusuke: Wait a minute...FAIRYTALES?! I don't wanna be in any dumb fairytales...   
  
Agi: Please?   
  
Yusuke: No.   
  
Agi: Fine...I GUESS I'LL HAVE TO USE FORCE! *whips out a large frozen fish*   
  
All: o.O   
  
Hiei: *pokes the wavy lines coming from the fish* What are these things?   
  
Agi: Why those wavy lines are the FEAR that's EMINATING from it.   
  
Kuwabara: Oh...so that's why the litterbox does that...and all this time I just thought it smelled bad...   
  
Yusuke: That's very...nice. But...what do you think you can possibly do with that dead fish?   
  
Agi: Yes...it DOES look like an ordinary dead fish, doesn't it? But when used PROPERLY it becomes an instrument of VIOLENCE!!   
  
Kuwabara: Like a trumpet?   
  
Agi: Allow me to demonstrate...*pelts Kuwabara in the head with the fish*   
  
Kuwabara: EASTER TREE! @_@ *blacks out*   
  
All: O_O   
  
Agi: Now...SUBMIT!!!   
  
All: *look at eachother* *shrug* *cower in fear*   
  
Agi: That's more like it...   
  
Kuwabara: @____________________@ 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Wow...it feels good to write fics again ^______^ Ok well...the parodies start next chapter...which will be up soon (hopefully...) 


	2. Cinderella

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 2: **   
  
Cinderella A.K.A. Blenders and Wheelchairs and Turbans, Oh my!   
  
  
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Weeee~!!! Thanks to everybody that reviewed!! *feels loved* And, as promised, I updated ^^ (it's a miracle...)   
  
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Agi: *runs around screaming*   
  
Hiei: Not again...   
  
Yusuke: What's she so happy about this time?   
  
Agi: I WROTE THE SCRIPTS~!!!!!! *runs around and hands everybody a packet of papers*   
  
All: ...   
  
Yusuke: *looks at the script* O_O.....CINDERELLA?! We're doing CINDERELLA?! If you think I'm gonna be in--   
  
Agi: *whacks Yusuke in the head with a drawer of silverware*   
  
Yusuke: @.@   
  
Kuwabara: *stomps around and shakes his script violently* THIS IS AN OUTRAGE!!   
  
Karasu: Why? What part did she give you? The glass slipper?   
  
Kuwabara: No! WORSE! I have to be a stupid MOUSE!!   
  
Yusuke: *dusts himself off* She made me a mouse too...oh well. I just feel sorry for the sucker who has to play Cinderella...   
  
Kurama: *whistles*   
  
Kuwabara: ............AHAHAHA!!!! Kurama's CINDERELLA!! HAHAHAHA!   
  
Kurama: *blushes*   
  
Yusuke: Hehe...If you're Cinderella...then *snickers* who's playing Prince Charming?   
  
Hiei: *hides script behind his back*   
  
All: *look at Hiei*   
  
Hiei: Umm...*points* OH MY GOSH!! That 18-wheeler is coming right for us! ......MAKE SURE YOU LOOK AT IT!!   
  
Yusuke, Kurama, & Karasu: *turn around and look*   
  
Kuwabara: Ohhhh no. I'm not falling for that lame--*gets hit by the 18-wheeler*   
  
Hiei: I warned him...   
  
Kuwabara: Sand.....wich...........   
  
Agi: Well it looks like your all ready now, so I'm gonna start NARRATING!! ^^   
  
All: ...................   
  
  
  
Agi: Here goes...*clears throat* Once upon a--   
  
Kuwabara: TRACTOR!!   
  
*WHACK*   
  
Kuwabara: @______@   
  
Agi: AHEM...Once upon a--   
  
Karasu: Tractor? There were never any tractors in the stories mommy used to read me...   
  
*WHACK WHACK WHACK*   
  
Karasu: @_________________@   
  
Agi: ONCE UPON A FRIGGIN' *looks around* ...TIME...!! There was a young girl (tee-hee! ^^).   
  
Kurama: *wearing a very frilly pink dress* Why do I have to be a girl? Where's Botan and Keiko and all the other...GIRLS?!   
  
Agi: *sigh* The girls didn't want to be in the fic...something about "reputations"...   
  
Kurama: o.O   
  
Agi: Besides, your prettier than them anyway ^.~   
  
Kurama: .......   
  
Agi: Well anyway, one fine day the girl's father died...   
  
Kurama: ;_;   
  
Yusuke: ...How'd he die?   
  
Agi: Skydiving accident.   
  
Yusuke: ...Oh.   
  
Agi: Now...STOP INTERRUPTING ME!   
  
All: o.o   
  
Agi: So after her dad kicked the bucket, the girl had to live with her evil stepmother and two stepsisters...   
  
*a carboard house falls on top of Kurama*   
  
*...followed by a blender and two chickens*   
  
Kurama: *twitch*   
  
Agi: The stepmother and stepsisters were very cruel to the poor girl...   
  
*the chickens and the blender attack Kurama*   
  
Agi: They called her mean names...   
  
Blender: *WHIRRRRRRRRR*   
  
Agi: And they made her do strenuous manly labor...   
  
Kurama: *waters the flowers*   
  
Agi: They started calling her "Cinderella" because she was always covered in cinders from cleaning the volcano in the backyard every Wednesday.   
  
Karasu: MAKE WAY FOR MAKE-UP~!!! *runs by and dumps a bucket of ashes on Kurama*   
  
Kurama: MY DRESS!!   
  
Agi: Umm...Karasu? Where'd you get those ashes from??   
  
Karasu: Oh, I found them in a box labelled "MOON DUST" I didn't think anybody needed it, so I just took it.   
  
Agi: Oh, ok then...   
  
Karasu: ^_______^ *scurries away*   
  
Agi: Now where was I...? Oh yes, Cinderella didn't let any of the teasing get to her...   
  
Kurama: EVERYBODY'S SO MEAN!! *cries hysterically*   
  
Agi: She had her mice friends to talk to...who were suprisingly intelligent for rodents...   
  
Kuwabara: *points to Yusuke's mouse ears* Hey Urameshi...you've got two cardboard circles on your head...   
  
Yusuke: *flails about* AHHH!! GET THEM OFF!!!!   
  
Agi: One day at the royal palace, the prince was very bored...   
  
Hiei: *beats up some servants*   
  
Agi: His father, the king, decided to throw a royal ball--   
  
Karasu: A royal ball? Why couldn't he have thrown a baseball? Or a volleyball?   
  
Agi: -_-;;;;;;; *bashes Karasu in the head with an 8-track player*   
  
Karasu: I'M SPARICUSSSSSSSS......!!! *blacks out*   
  
Agi: Anyway, the king decided to throw a royal--   
  
Kuwabara: HOEDOWN!!!   
  
Agi: *grits teeth* FINE. A royal HOEDOWN.   
  
Kuwabara: Yay!   
  
Agi: The king was hoping that the prince would find himself a wife at the hoedown...   
  
Hiei: Hey, who is the king anyway???   
  
Koenma: *pops up out of nowhere* Was that my queue to come in?   
  
Kuwabara: Hey!! What's he doing here?!   
  
Koenma: Why...I'm the KING!! Who ELSE would I be?!   
  
All: ...   
  
Koenma: Besides, I couldn't pass up such a great money making oppurtunity...   
  
Yusuke: Wait a minute...you're getting PAID to do this?!   
  
Koenma: *nods*   
  
All: *glare at Agi*   
  
Agi: Ehehe...^^;;; Now, where was I...?   
  
Yusuke: I want money!!   
  
Agi: Here we go...The King wanted his son to find a wife...   
  
Koenma: Son, I command you to get married!!   
  
Hiei: No.   
  
Agi: So King Koenma sent invitations to the hoedown all throughout the kingdom...   
  
Mailtruck full of invitations: Zoooooooooom! *runs over an old lady with a shopping cart*   
  
Agi: And of course, an invitation was sent to Cinderella's house...   
  
*a brick with a piece of paper attached flies through the cardboard window*   
  
Kurama: Not another ransom note...   
  
Agi: Cinderella's step mother was very excited that one of her daughters might become the prince's wife...   
  
Blender: *does the tango*   
  
Agi: But poor Cinderella wasn't allowed to go to the palace. She didn't have a beatiful gown to wear...   
  
Kurama: *sigh of relief*   
  
Agi: Cinderella was very sad and ran up to her room and started crying...   
  
Kurama: *dances around happily*   
  
Agi: Her mouse friends noticed how sad she was and decided to make a gown for her to wear...   
  
Yusuke & Kuwabara: *attempt to sew some fabric together*   
  
Agi: They suprised Cinderella with the gown when they were finished...   
  
Kurama: *puts the jumble of fabric on* Oh...what a lovely...toga...?   
  
Yusuke & Kuwabara: ^_______^   
  
Agi: Now that Cinderella had a gown, she could go to the royal hoedown...   
  
Kurama: *walks out the door*   
  
Agi: But all of a sudden, a strange little woman appeared on the front lawn...   
  
Karasu: *rolls around in the grass*   
  
Kurama: O.o   
  
Karasu: Oh. Umm...AHEM...HELLO THERE CINDERELLA!!!   
  
Kurama: ........What the hell do you want?   
  
Karasu: Why...I'm your fairy BOMB mother!!! *twirls around and poses dramatically*   
  
Kurama: O______o   
  
Karasu: And from what I can see, it appears that your going to that party at the palace everyone's going to...   
  
Kurama: Why yes, I--   
  
Karasu: Everyone except ME of course. How come I didn't get an invitation?! HUH?! Am I not QUALIFIED or something?! Do you have to have a certain SANITY LEVEL?!?!   
  
Kurama: ...........   
  
Karasu: *grumbles*   
  
Agi: Cinderella's fairy...bomb...mother decided that Cinderella needed a few...improvements...   
  
Karasu: *points at Kurama's "gown"* Eek! You're gonna go to the hoedown wearing THAT?!   
  
Kurama: Umm...yes I am...   
  
Karasu: Ok fine...but I hope you're not thinking about driving that *motions towards the car* MONSTROUSITY to the palace...   
  
Kurama: But that's a CORVETTE!!   
  
Yusuke: Hey! Where'd Kurama get a Corvette from?!   
  
*WHACK*   
  
Karasu: You'll need something fancier than a Corvette to impress this prince guy.   
  
Kurama: What do you mean?   
  
Karasu: Watch carefully. I shall use my magic WAND! *pulls a plastic spoon out of his pocket* Now I'll just say the magic words...Bibbity...Bobbity..........BOOM~!!! *taps car with the spoon*   
  
*queue LARGE, FIREY EXPLOSION*   
  
Kurama: O__________________O   
  
Karasu: O.O;;;;;;;;;;;;;   
  
Kurama: My car!! MY BEAUTIFUL CAR!!! *points to the ball of FIRE* LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO MY CAR!!!!!!   
  
Karasu: Ehehehe ^^;;;;;;;;; Well umm...now it's a "hot" rod...get it?? Hehehehehe...   
  
Kurama: -_____-;;;   
  
Karasu: I guess I better be going now...*runs away*   
  
Agi: Because Cinderella's car was destroyed...she had to find a different way to get to the palace...   
  
Kurama: *notices an old man in a wheelchair rolling down the street* *grabs the old man and throws him onto the sidewalk*   
  
Old man: Hey! Have you no respect for the--*gets hit by a scooter*   
  
Kurama: *rides wheelchair full speed down the street*   
  
Agi: After a few stops to get gas, Cinderella made it to the palace...   
  
Kurama: *bursts through the doors*   
  
Hiei: Kurama! Ya made it!!   
  
Kurama: Yup.   
  
Agi: And so Cinderella and the prince spent the whole night square dancing and cow tipping and doing...hoedown stuff...   
  
Hiei: Hmm...got any 3's?   
  
Kurama: Go fish.   
  
Hiei: Dammit.   
  
Agi: Then Cinderella noticed it was midnite...   
  
Kurama: *gasp!* It's midnite!!   
  
Hiei: So?   
  
Kurama: Hmm...I dunno. It must mean something...maybe I should go.   
  
Hiei: Okie dokie.   
  
Agi: And so Cinderella went back home to her old slave-driven life.   
  
Kurama: *watches TV*   
  
Agi: Meanwhile, at the palace, the prince was frantically trying to find the girl he fell in love with the night before...   
  
Hiei: *looks in the classifieds section of a newspaper* Hey! Somebody's giving away a free washing machine!! *dials number*   
  
Agi: Then the prince remembered that the girl had left an article of clothing at the palace before she left...   
  
Hiei: Eww...   
  
Agi: And it happened to be a--   
  
Kuwabara: TURBAN!!   
  
Kurama: I was wearing a turban???   
  
Hiei: No.   
  
Kurama: I'm confused...O.o   
  
Agi: Anyway...the prince searched the entire kingdom for the girl that lost the...turban.   
  
Hiei: *walks up to an employee at a fish market* Umm...is this your...turban?   
  
Employee: I don't know. I just work here.   
  
Hiei: Ok. I give up. Kurama, take your stupid turban back.   
  
Kurama: But it's not my turban...   
  
Hiei: It is now.   
  
Agi: And so the prince found the woman of his dreams...   
  
Hiei: .......   
  
Kurama: ^____^   
  
Agi: And they lived happily ever--   
  
Kuwabara: PELICAN!!   
  
Agi: THE END.   
  
  
  
Yusuke: That was a stupid story. Agi, you really have no life.   
  
Agi: I know~~!! *smiles proudly* ^__^   
  
Koenma: Ahem...   
  
Agi: Oh yeah *hands Koenma a check*   
  
Koenma: Pleasure doin' business with ya! *marches off*   
  
Yusuke: Little brat...   
  
Kuwabara: Yeah...I've always wanted a little piece of paper like that...   
  
All: .......   
  
Karasu: FLAMING BREAD!!! 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Yay! That was fun ^^ Oh yeah, if you have any requests for fairytales, they're gladly accepted ^_^ I have a few already...next chap will probably be either Snow White or Hansel and Gretel. Thanks Baka Gothic Kitsune and co. for the suggestions ^____^ 


	3. Agi's Birthday

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 3: **   
  
Agi's Birthday A.K.A. RANDOMNESS   
  
  
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This used to be a short notice, but since people left reviews on it, I didn't want to delete it. So I replaced it with THIS. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!! XDD   
  
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All: HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGI!!!   
  
Agi: How sweet...You're all wishing ME a happy birthday??   
  
All: Only cause you paid us to!! ^___^   
  
Agi: So what'd you guys get me????   
  
Hiei: Hey...you only paid us to say happy birthday. There were no presents involved.   
  
Kuwabara: I GOT YOU SOMETHING!!   
  
Agi: REALLY?!   
  
Kuwabara: Yup! *hands his present to Agi* It's a sock.   
  
Agi: Oh...wow. o_O It's...enchanting.............ANYBODY ELSE?!   
  
Kurama: I bought you this shampoo. Maybe one day your hair will be as nice as mine.   
  
Agi: ........umm....yay.   
  
Yusuke: I made you this cheesecake. *shoves it in Agi's face*   
  
Agi: Why thank you Yusuke!   
  
Yusuke: Your welcome. I hope you choke.   
  
Karasu: My turn! *hands Agi a gift wrapped package*   
  
Agi: Squeee! I wonder what it could be....*starts to unwrap it*   
  
Karasu: It's a bomb.   
  
*screen goes black*   
  
Please stand by...   
  
*elevator music plays while time-lapse footage of a flower blooming plays*   
  
*Screen comes back to Agi and friends*   
  
All: *fall from the ceiling looking slightly incinerated*   
  
Karasu: I hope you liked it! ^^   
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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WE GO BOOM!!! 


	4. Hansel and Gretel

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 4: **   
  
Hansel and Gretel A.K.A. Gnomes Eat Soap   
  
  
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If you didn't notice...I replaced last chapter's notice with some randomness (since today's my birthday, it's a little birthday...thing XD)   
  
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Agi: MWAHA!!   
  
All: .....   
  
Agi: Guess which fairy tale you guys are gonna embarass yourselves doing next?!   
  
Kuwabara: MELON!!!   
  
Agi: Close...but no. We're gonna do--   
  
Karasu: Hey, did you know that melon spelled backwards is NOLEM?!   
  
Agi: Ahem...we're doing....HANSEL AND GRETEL!!   
  
Karasu: NOLEM! NOLEM! NOLEM!   
  
Agi: So what do you guys think?   
  
All: *moan*   
  
Agi: Great! *passes out all the scripts*   
  
Karasu: *is given the part for the evil witch* TT_TT Why do I always have to be the villian?!   
  
Yusuke: O_o The fairy godmother was a villian???   
  
Kurama: *glares at Yusuke*   
  
Yusuke: Oh yes, of course she was...^_^;;   
  
  
  
Agi: Once upon a time, there was a poor old wood-cutter and his wife...   
  
Hiei: I am NOT a poor old wood-cutter.   
  
Kurama: I'm a girl...AGAIN?!   
  
Agi: Ahem...they had two children. The boy was named Hansel...   
  
Kuwabara: *looks at his feet* Cool! I have shoes made from dead trees! :D   
  
All: ..........   
  
Agi: Aaaaaand...the cute little girl was named Gretel...   
  
Yusuke: *hiding behind a tree* I am NOT coming out wearing this!!!!   
  
Agi: Come on Yusuke...You're costume isn't that bad...   
  
Yusuke: Wanna bet? *steps out from behind the tree*   
  
All: O.O   
  
Yusuke: *blushes*   
  
Agi: Umm...well...umm...I don't remember your costume being that...revealing...*shields eyes*   
  
Kuwabara: *wolfwhistles*   
  
Agi: Who's been tampering with the costumes?!   
  
Karasu: *cackles evilly*   
  
Agi: Ok...nevermind. Let's proceed.   
  
Yusuke: WAIT!! Aren't you gonna let me get get changed?!   
  
Agi: Hmm...I suppose...*shoves a barrel over Yusuke* CHANGE!!   
  
Kuwabara: *points* Hey...I have wooden shoes...and now you have a wooden...CONTAINER!   
  
Yusuke: -_____-;;;;;   
  
Agi: Anyways, the family was very poor...   
  
Kurama: Wow! I just won the lottery!   
  
Agi: The parents could barely get by with their part-time jobs as mimes...   
  
Hiei: Arrrr...Avast ye mateys!   
  
Kurama: Hoist the sails! ^-^   
  
Agi: I said MIMES...not pirates.   
  
Hiei: I HATE MIMES!!!   
  
Agi: ...   
  
Yusuke: I don't remember pirates OR mimes in Hansel and Gretel...   
  
Agi: Hmm...what about lion tamers?   
  
Yusuke: No.   
  
Agi: Choreographers?   
  
Yusuke: No!   
  
Agi: ............ninjas?   
  
All: NO!!!!!   
  
Agi: FINE! THEY DIDN'T HAVE JOBS. AT ALL. THEY WERE LAZY HOBOS THAT ROAMED THE TUNDRA SELLING FIRE EXTINGUISHERS TO THE BLIND. SO THERE. *pants*   
  
All: o_O   
  
Agi: And due to their lack of money, they couldn't afford to buy food for their children anymore...   
  
Kurama: *throws gourmet dinner out the window* Oh well...I guess they'll just have to eat sticks.   
  
Agi: Their children were such burdens that their parents started plotting a way to get rid of them...   
  
Hiei: *whips out a flamethrower*   
  
Agi: NOT LIKE THAT!!   
  
Hiei: ;_; *lights a match*   
  
Agi: The wife suggested to take the children into the middle of the forest and leave them there, so that they would never come back...   
  
Kurama: Hey kids! We're going on a SAFARI!! ^_-   
  
Agi: But their father felt sorry for them...   
  
Hiei: DEATH TO THE CHILDREN!!   
  
Agi: Luckily, Hansel and Gretel overheard their parent's evil plot...   
  
Yusuke: *flips through his script* Where the hell are we?!   
  
Kuwabara: *snore*   
  
Agi: Hansel was very smart and devised a way to get back home after they were abandoned...   
  
Kuwabara: *skips through the garden* Hmm...*picks up some pebbles* I think these little white thingies are going to come in handy when our parents leave us for dead in the middle of the forest...*shoves the pebbles in his pocket*   
  
Agi: The next morning, the mother and father put their plan into action...   
  
Hiei: HEY KIDS!! You better run while you've got the chance!!   
  
Agi: They were going to take Hansel and Gretel into the forest to collect firewood...   
  
Kurama: Come along children, we're going to gather flammable items from the forest.   
  
Yusuke: I'll grab the squirrel nets!   
  
Agi: And so they set off into the woods, the parents not knowing the children had plotted a way to return...   
  
Yusuke: Hey Kuwabara, you've been dropping those pebbles as we've been going along...right?   
  
Kuwabara: Pebbles?   
  
Yusuke: O.O Those "white thingies" you got from the garden!   
  
Kuwabara: OH YEAH! The white thingies! Yeah! They were yummy.   
  
Yusuke: O_O?!?!?!?! You ATE the PEBBLES?! How are we supposed to get back now?!?!?!   
  
Kuwabara: Hmmm...*digs around in his pocket* LOOKIE!! *pulls out a mound of fuzzy stuff* We can leave a trail of ducklings instead!   
  
Yusuke: Ducklings?! Why were you keeping ducklings in your pocket???   
  
Kuwabara: *squeezes them* They are so kyooot!!! ^^   
  
Yusuke: -_-;;;;   
  
Agi: When they reached their destination, the mother and father lit a fire and told the children to sleep while they went to go chop wood...   
  
Hiei: Ok kiddies, now take a nap and hopefully you'll roll into the fire in your sleep...   
  
Agi: And so Hansel and Gretel fell asleep by the fire, and when they awoke their parents were gone...   
  
Yusuke: Yay! Freedom at last!   
  
Agi: But they were able to find their way home buy following their trail of...ducklings...   
  
Kuwabara: Careful not to step on any Urameshi!!   
  
Agi: Hansel and Gretel returned home much to the suprise of their parents...   
  
Kurama: You stupid kids! You weren't supposed to come back! *beats Yusuke and Kuwabara with a broom*   
  
Agi: The children got to stay at home, but a little while later the parents planned to get rid of them yet again...   
  
Hiei: *stands next to the road with Yusuke and Kuwabara* FREE CHILDREN!!!   
  
Agi: And just as before they set off into forest...   
  
Yusuke: Ok Kuwabara, you DID bring something to mark a trail with, right?   
  
Kuwabara: Yup! *points to the wagon full of cannonballs being pulled being him*   
  
Yusuke: *bangs head against a tree*   
  
Agi: And once again, Hansel and Gretel fell asleep by the fire that was built...   
  
Kuwabara: *gets chased by a skunk*   
  
Agi: When morning came and the children were to go home, they found that the trail they had left was gone...   
  
Yusuke: WHERE THE @&$% IS THE TRAIL?!?!   
  
Kuwabara: Looks like all the little birdies ate all those cannonballs we left behind.   
  
Yusuke: O_o   
  
Agi: But they didn't give up hope...they would make it back somehow...   
  
Yusuke: WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!! *rocks back and forth*   
  
Agi: They wandered the woods for days, and soon became weary from hunger...   
  
Kuwabara: I'm so...WEIRD!! *collapses* x_x   
  
Yusuke: WEARY! Not weird.   
  
Agi: At one point they spotted a strange little man...   
  
Kuwabara: A GNOME!! LET'S EAT IT!! *goes to chase it*   
  
Yusuke: *grabs him* Wait. Let's follow the little cretin. Maybe he'll lead us to his herd or something.   
  
Agi: So Hansel and Gretal followed the little gnome man until it led them to a house--   
  
Karasu: Wigwam.   
  
Agi: A wigwam...made of--   
  
Karasu: Soap.   
  
Agi: A wigwam made of soap?? o.O   
  
Karasu: YES! *skips away*   
  
Agi: Ok then...the gnome led them to a wigwam made of soap.   
  
Gnome: *begins eating the wigwam*   
  
Kuwabara: Look! An edible...RESIDENCE!! *goes to eat the wigwam*   
  
Yusuke: *goes also*   
  
Agi: As they were eating the soap wigwam, they heard a voice coming from inside. "Nibble, nibble, gnaw, Who is nibbling at my little house?" it said.   
  
Karasu: Nibble, nibble, gnaw...WHO THE &*(% IS EATING MY HOUSE?!   
  
Agi: The wind, the wind, The heaven-born wind" the children answered.   
  
Kuwabara: WE ARE! WE'RE EATING YOUR HOUSE!   
  
Agi: Hansel and Gretel continued eating the soap, then all of a sudden a strange old lady came hobbling out the door.   
  
Karasu: *steps outside and falls down the front steps*   
  
Yusuke and Kuwabara: O_o   
  
Karasu: *dusts himself off* Ahem...why hello dear children. Please do come inside...   
  
Yusuke: No. You scare me.   
  
Karasu: But I'm so lonely~ *grabs Yusuke and Kuwabara and starts dragging them inside* Must...have...GUESTS....   
  
Agi: The old woman made them a feast and gave them clean beds to sleep in...   
  
Yusuke: These beds aren't clean...   
  
Agi: The woman was only pretending to be so kind. She was really an undercover chef working for McDonald's...   
  
Karasu: Would you like *twitch* FRIES with that?!   
  
Agi: She planned on fattening the children and making them into cheeseburgers and milkshakes...   
  
Yusuke: Ewww...   
  
Agi: The old woman locked the Hansel and Gretel in cages and fed them until they were fat enough to be cooked.   
  
Yusuke: I am NOT fat!!!   
  
Kuwabara: *eats more soap*   
  
Agi: Then it came time to cook the children...   
  
Karasu: But I don't have an oven...   
  
*an oven falls out of the sky and lands on Karasu*   
  
Kuwabara: How convenient!   
  
Yusuke: And look! Our cages magically opened! ^___^   
  
Agi: Hansel and Gretel ran out of the house and back into the forest...   
  
Karasu: *crawls out from under the oven* Wait a minute!! Aww...screw it.   
  
Agi: And soon enough they made it home again...   
  
Hiei: Damn...don't they ever quit?   
  
Kurama: So, children what did you bring home with you?   
  
Yusuke and Kuwabara: *thrust out handfuls of soap*   
  
Hiei and Kurama: WE'RE SAVED!!   
  
Agi: Umm...and so they lived happily ever after?   
  
All: *nod*   
  
Agi: THE END. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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In case you didn't notice...that's not exactly how the real story goes ^^;; I took a few liberties with the plot ^____^ And as for requests, don't worry, I shall get to them ^^ 


	5. Little Red Riding Hood

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 5: **   
  
Little Red Riding Hood A.K.A. Kuwabara Saves the Day   
  
  
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Yay! A new chapter ^^ Of course, thanks everybody that reviewed and a special thanks to everybody that wished me a happy birthday! :D   
  
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Agi: *prods box*   
  
Karasu: *walks in*   
  
Agi: Hey, where's everyone else?   
  
Karasu: In the basement.   
  
Agi: o.O There's a basement here?   
  
Karasu: No. So what's with the box?   
  
Agi: *shoves the box in Karasu's face* It's a birthday gift from Ancient Angel!!! ^___^   
  
Karasu: ......   
  
Agi: See, I can pull three things out of it. ANY three things I want!   
  
Karasu: *puts on hard hat*   
  
Agi: Hmm...*reaches in the box* *pulls out a harpoon gun* COOL!   
  
Karasu: O.O;;; *takes cover behind the couch*   
  
Agi: ^^ Let's see...what next? ...I KNOW!! *pulls out a fork*   
  
Karasu: .....? A fork?   
  
Agi: A SPECIAL fork...this one lasts twice as long in the microwave as a normal fork! ^^   
  
Karasu: That's...facinating. So...what's your last thing gonna be?   
  
Agi: *ponders*   
  
*5 hours later...*   
  
Agi: I GOT IT!!!!   
  
Karasu: O_O   
  
Agi: YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE ALWAYS WANTED?!   
  
Karasu: ........Mental help?   
  
Agi: NO!!!! *shoves hand into the box* *pulls out a little man* My very. own. ...LEPRECHAUN!!!!!!!!   
  
Karasu: o.O;   
  
Agi: Isn't he CUTE?! I think I'll name him...LEPRACY!!!   
  
Lepracy: *shrieks*   
  
Agi: *hands Lepracy to Karasu*   
  
Lepracy: *latches onto Karasu's head*   
  
Karasu: X_O;;;;   
  
Agi: MWAHAHAHAHA!!! *runs off*   
  
Karasu: Wait! What about--   
  
Lepracy: *yanks Karasu's hair*   
  
Karasu: ;_;   
  
  
  
Yusuke, Kuwabara, Hiei & Kurama: *gathered around playing limbo*   
  
Agi: *walks in* Where were you guys?   
  
Kurama: At the limbo store! ^__^   
  
Agi: Limbo...store?   
  
Yusuke: Yeah, they sell limbos there.   
  
Kuwabara: And farming equipment! ^^   
  
Agi: ......   
  
Hiei: Who's turn is it?   
  
Agi: Can I play?   
  
Yusuke: But don't you have another deranged story for us to perform?   
  
Agi: *sigh* I'm lazy........   
  
Readers: WE DEMAND ANOTHER FAIRY TALE!!!   
  
Agi: TT_TT Fine...I guess I could throw something together really quick...   
  
Readers: YAY! *put away all their sharp death-inflicting objects*   
  
Agi: So what should we do?   
  
All: *ponder*   
  
Kuwabara: Let's do CHUTES AND LADDERS!!!   
  
Agi: *grabs the limbo stick and whacks Kuwabara with it* You moron, that's not a fairy tale...   
  
Kuwabara: Darn...I always get fairy tales and brands of deodorant mixed up...   
  
Agi: Anyways, I was thinking about doing Little Red Riding Hood...   
  
All: Umm...   
  
Agi: Great! Hiei's Little Red Riding Hood!   
  
Hiei: WHAT?!   
  
Agi: Yusuke can be Little Red Riding Hood's mom...   
  
Yusuke: o.o;;;   
  
Agi: Kurama, you can be the grandmother...   
  
Kurama: ;___;   
  
Agi: Kuwabara you can be...umm...the huntsman dude that comes and saves the day...   
  
Kuwabara: Yay!   
  
Agi: Now all we need is an evil wolf...Where's Karasu?   
  
Karasu: *runs in with Lepracy still on his head* GET IT OFF!!! GET IT OFFFFFFFFF!!!!   
  
Agi: Aww~ He likes you...   
  
Hiei: *points at Lepracy* What IS that...THING?!   
  
Agi: Why, that's Lepracy!   
  
Yusuke: ...Isn't that a disease?   
  
Agi: No! That's LEPROSY.   
  
All: Ohhhhhh....   
  
Karasu: *tries prying Lepracy out off his head* My hair...MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR!!!! TT_____TT   
  
Agi: Ok so now that we have the cast, let's get this over with so we can play limbo!!   
  
All: Aye-aye captain!   
  
  
  
Agi: Once upon a time there lived a woman and her daughter...   
  
Yusuke: *twitch* This is disturbing.   
  
Hiei: Tell me about it.   
  
Agi: The girl was called Little Red Riding Hood because she always wore a red hooded cape...thingy...   
  
Hiei: *dressed in a suit of armor*   
  
Agi: Close enough. Anyway, one day Little Red Riding Hood's mother gave her a basket of food to take to her sick grandmother...   
  
Yusuke: *shoves a mousetrap, a hornet's nest, a chainsaw, and a poodle in a basket* Little Red Riding Hood! I need you to take this crap to your grandma so she can get better!   
  
Hiei: I have a grandma?   
  
Agi: So Little Red Riding Hood set off into the forest...   
  
Hiei: TAXI!!   
  
Agi: And soon she ran into a wolf...   
  
Hiei: Nice hat wolf dude...   
  
Karasu: Thanks~ -____-;;;   
  
Lepracy: *screams*   
  
Karasu: X_X   
  
Agi: The wolf was curious as to where Little Red Riding Hood was going...   
  
Karasu: So where are you heading you little...knight? The Crusades are over you know...   
  
Hiei: I'm off to deliver this basket of goodies to my dear ill grandmother. *gag*   
  
Karasu: How...THOUGHTFUL of you. So tell me, where does this GRANDMOTHER of yours live? Not like a wanna eat her or anything...   
  
Hiei: She lives on an iceberg.   
  
Karasu: o_O   
  
Hiei: But only on Thursdays...every other day she lives right through these woods. Would you like a guided tour?   
  
Karasu: SURE!   
  
Agi: So Little Red Riding Hood and the wolf walked through the forest together...   
  
Karasu: Hey little red person, look at those beautiful flowers! *points to a parking meter* Why don't you go sniff them?   
  
Hiei: I hate flowers.   
  
Karasu: Kurama should have been Little Red Riding Hood...oh well. *turns to Hiei* I said...SNIFF THE DAMN FLOWERS!!!   
  
Hiei: Fine! *goes over to the flowers and begins stomping on them* Take that nature!   
  
Agi: In the meantime, the wolf ran ahead to the grandmother's house and knocked on the door...   
  
Karasu: *bounds out of the woods and throws himself against the door*   
  
Kurama: *playing video games* Who is it?   
  
Karasu: CANDYGRAM!   
  
Lepracy: *squeak*   
  
Kurama: Oh, it's Little Red Riding Hood! Come in deary! I'd answer the door, but I just got to level 500 and mustn't...leave...screen...   
  
Agi: So the wolf let himself in and went over to the grandmother...   
  
Karasu: *stares at the TV screen* Ooh! Ooh! Go left! Jump! JUMP!!! Watch out for the zombies!   
  
Agi: A short time later, Little Red Riding Hood arrived after she...destroyed the forest...   
  
Hiei: *walks over and sits next to Kurama and Karasu* Quick! Shoot him! Noooo! Watch out! He's right behind you!!!!!   
  
Agi: Hey guys? ...GUYS?!   
  
Kurama, Karasu & Hiei: *eyes glued to the TV* O_O   
  
Lepracy: *eats a ham sandwich*   
  
Agi: HEY!! The wolf was supposed to EAT the grandmother! ...HELLO?!   
  
Yusuke: *walks in and sits down* Quick!! Use your shields! Whew...that was close...   
  
Agi: *sigh~*   
  
Kuwabara: *pops up* Is it time for me to save the day yet?   
  
Agi: *buries face in hands* Sure...   
  
Kuwabara: Yipee!! *bursts through the wall and smashes the TV with a tennis racket*   
  
Kurama, Karasu, Hiei, & Yusuke: ...........................   
  
Kuwabara: I'm Captain Save-the-Day! Saver of days!! *does a heroic pose*   
  
Kurama, Karasu, Hiei, & Yusuke: *loom over Kuwabara*   
  
Kuwabara: ...Did I do something wrong?   
  
  
  
All: *playing limbo*   
  
Yusuke: You're turn Agi.   
  
Agi: Yay! *limbos*   
  
Hiei: Kuwabara makes a good limbo stick.   
  
All: *laugh*   
  
Kuwabara: This isn't funny! I demand you let me down!   
  
Karasu: Hey, did you know that in some places they play limbo as a ritual and the stick is actually lit on fire??   
  
All: *eye Kuwabara evilly*   
  
Kuwabara: O_O;;;;;   
  
Agi: THE END~!!! XD 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Hehe...poor Kuwabara...I really do love the guy, but bashing him is just so much fun ^___^ Ok anyway, next chapter will be Snow White, I promise, since that's what the majority of you are requesting me to do... 


	6. Snow White

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 6: **   
  
Snow White A.K.A. The Plot Takes a Vacation   
  
  
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*fanfare plays* Yay! I have RETURNED. Sorry for not updating this, it's a long story and I don't feel like wasting my life writing it here. So I hope you all forgive me, and ENJOY THE NEXT FRICKEN' CHAPTER! XDDD   
  
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Yusuke: *look of CONCENTRATION*   
  
Kurama & Hiei: ..............   
  
Hiei: Just...GO ALREADY!!!   
  
Yusuke: Ok ok ok.....Hmmmm......   
  
Kurama & Hiei: -_______-   
  
Yusuke: Ok...here goes...   
  
Agi: *walks into kitchen and opens the refrigerator*   
  
Yusuke, Kurama, & Hiei: *fall out*   
  
Agi: O_O   
  
Hiei: *throws croquet mallet across the room* Well, guess that game's over...   
  
Yusuke: *cries* B-b-but...I WAS SO CLOSE TO WINNING!! TT___TT   
  
Agi: Umm...why were you guys playing croquet in the refrigerator? What ever happened to limbo?   
  
Kurama: The stick ran off...   
  
*Somewhere...FAR away...*   
  
Kuwabara: *is chased by rabid baboons*   
  
*Back to NOW*   
  
Kurama: And hopscotch on the stove got a little...dangerous.   
  
Yusuke & Hiei: *hold up burnt feet*   
  
Hiei: AND we couldn't play under the couch...   
  
Agi: Why not?   
  
Yusuke: Because of the Vikings...   
  
Agi: There's...Vikings under the couch???   
  
Yusuke: Yup.   
  
Agi: Ok then...Hey, where's Karasu?   
  
Kurama: *points* In the cupboard.   
  
Yusuke: He's hiding from the Vikings...   
  
Agi: o_O *opens the cupboard*   
  
Karasu: *curled up in a ball* Big......furry..........MEN! *rocks back and forth*   
  
Hiei: He got a little...traumatized.   
  
Agi: *picks up the toaster and bashes Karasu with it* RISE AND SHINE!!!   
  
Karasu: NOT THE APPLESAUCE!! @______@   
  
All: ...........   
  
Yusuke: So...umm...what stupid fairy tale are we doing now?   
  
Agi: Snow White~~~!!!!!! But, before we can start, we gotta find a replacement for Kuwabara, since his off on his little "adventure."   
  
Kuwabara: *runs through the background covered in syrup*   
  
All: o_O   
  
Hiei: Who can we possibly get to replace that barbarian?   
  
*The doorbell rings*   
  
Kurama: I didn't know there was a door here...   
  
Agi: I'LL GET IT!!! *runs up to the door and rips it off its hinges*   
  
Jin: ^_^   
  
Agi: HELLO!   
  
Jin: ^____^   
  
Agi: HELLO?!   
  
Jin: *thrusts out a handful of jelly* Want some?   
  
Agi: ...HI JIN!! Would you like to be Kuwabara's replacement?   
  
Jin: I like jelly *hugs the jelly*   
  
Agi: *drags Jin inside* Welcome aboard!   
  
Jin: Hey! It's Urameshi! *bounds up to Yusuke*   
  
Yusuke: ......   
  
Agi: Ok then...I think we're good to go now ^___^   
  
Yusuke: What about Karasu?   
  
Karasu: *sprawled out on the floor* MOMMY! King George has STOLEN my PANTYHOSE! OH THE HORROR!! *rolls around*   
  
Agi: Oh he'll be fine...*mops Karasu off the floor*   
  
Karasu: SPAGHETTI ON A STICK! *grabs the mop and starts gnawing on it*   
  
All: ........   
  
Lepracy: *vaporizes out of nowhere and latches onto Karasu's leg*   
  
  
  
Agi: .............Once upon a time in some castle in some imaginary far-away land...THERE LIVED A FEMALE.   
  
Yusuke: *runs*   
  
Agi: *grabs Yusuke and drags him over*   
  
Yusuke: TT____TT   
  
Agi: She was called Snow White because...um...her sheets were always...snowy white?   
  
Yusuke: *holds up a cutout of a very unrealistic bed from a catalog* ^_^   
  
Agi: There was also an evil queen person who had a magic mirror...   
  
Karasu: Mirror mirror on the wall...should I wear the black evening gown, or the red leather mini-skirt?   
  
Mirror: *does nothing*   
  
Karasu: Come on you stupid mirror! I thought you were magic! SAY SOMETHING!!!!   
  
Mirror: *does more nothing*   
  
Karasu: Can't you do anything besides act like a...a......MIRROR?!   
  
Mirror: A-B-C-D-E-F-G...   
  
Karasu: -_____-+ *blows the mirror up*   
  
Agi: Ok, forget the mirror. Anyway, the Evil Queen was very jealous of Snow White for her beauty and...other stuff...   
  
Karasu: Ewww. *points at Yusuke* I'm not jealous of HIM!   
  
Yusuke: ;___;   
  
Agi: And umm...*doesn't remember how the story goes* One day...the queen...who was evil...sent some guy out into the woods to kill Snow White.   
  
Karasu: ........   
  
Agi: What's wrong? Don't we have a hit-man?   
  
Karasu: We needed everyone we could get to play dwarves.   
  
Agi: -___-;;;; Fine. FORGET THE HIT-MAN. Instead Snow White ran away cause she was being chased by--   
  
Kuwabara: AN OUT-OF-CONTROL ICE CREAM TRUCK!!!!   
  
Agi: O_O Where'd you come from?!   
  
Kuwabara: *still covered in syrup* I...don't.........KNOW!!!! *thrusts himself full-speed into a tree*   
  
Agi: O.o........So, Snow White was chased by an out-of-control ice cream truck driven by--   
  
Karasu: RICHARD NIXON!   
  
Agi: Not you too -___-;;;   
  
Karasu: ^_^   
  
Agi: SO ANYWAY...Snow White was being chased by the OUT-OF-CONTROL ICE CREAM TRUCK that was being driven by RICHARD NIXON.   
  
Yusuke: Eep! *frolicks away through the woods*   
  
Richard Nixon: Vote for Nixon! Vote for Nixon! Vote for Nixon! Vote f--*drives truck off a cliff into a pit of flames*   
  
Yusuke: That was random...   
  
Agi: DID I SAY YOU COULD STOP RUNNING?!   
  
Yusuke: -_- *keeps running*   
  
Agi: Snow White kept running until she came to a little cottage...   
  
Yusuke: *stares at the cottage* Ooooh...Aaahhh~   
  
Agi: Since she knew this was the only form of civilization for miles, Snow White decided to just walk right in...   
  
Yusuke: *slices the door with a chainsaw*   
  
Agi: As soon as she was inside, she noticed how FILTHY and UNKEMPT the cottage was...   
  
Yusuke: O.O;;; *scoops the dirt from the plant he knocked over back in the flowerpot*   
  
Agi: Snow White decided to do the owner of the cottage a favor by tidying the place up...   
  
Yusuke: *dumps bleach on everything*   
  
Agi: Meanwhile, back at the ranch--I mean--castle the Evil Queen was plotting a way to get rid of Snow White for good...   
  
*queue evil-sounding music*   
  
*The Macarena starts playing*   
  
Agi: ^^;;;   
  
Karasu: Uhh...so how am I supposed to kill this Snow person...thing?   
  
Agi: With the evil poisoned apple of course.   
  
Karasu: Yeah but...I already had the so-called evil mirror and it wasn't very...evil. And this apple doesn't look very menacing either...   
  
Agi: You're right, we better not take any chances. *grabs the apple and tosses it into a lake*   
  
*All the fish and plant-life from the lake grow legs and run away frantically as the lake blows up killing everything in a 20-mile radius*   
  
Karasu: .........So now what?   
  
Agi: You can always just use this *hands Karasu a sledgehammer*   
  
Karasu: *squeals* *hops away*   
  
Lepracy: *still attached to Karasu's leg*   
  
Agi: Back at the cottage, Snow White had finished cleaning. Then she heard cheerful singing coming from the woods...   
  
Yusuke: *finishes cutting a table in half with the chainsaw* Hark! *cups ear* Are those angels I hear?   
  
Kuwabara: *comes crashing through the window*   
  
Hiei: *jumps in after him* That's what you get for ruining yet another job interview!   
  
Agi: Where'd he come from again?   
  
Kuwabara: I...don't........--*gets whacked with a folding chair*   
  
Hiei: SHUT UP!   
  
Kurama & Jin: *walk in casually*   
  
Yusuke: I'm bewildered.   
  
Agi: Soon Snow White discovered that these seven--er, FOUR men were the real owners of the cottage.   
  
Hiei: What the hell are you doing in our house?!   
  
Yusuke: O.O;;;   
  
Hiei: You will PAY! LET'S GET HIM!!!   
  
Kurama: *busy scraping Kuwabara off the floor*   
  
Jin: *walks into the dining room* Somebody's been eating my porridge ;_;   
  
Hiei: -___-;; Nevermind.   
  
Jin: *skips up to Yusuke* ^_________^   
  
Yusuke: O_o;;;   
  
Hiei: So umm...who are you lady-man thing?   
  
Yusuke: They call me Snow White, but my real name is Latoya Pootybooty...they didn't think that name would be very good name for a fairy tale though...   
  
Kurama: We're the dwarfy thingies that live here. We work at the refreshments stand at the cemetery...or at least...we used to...   
  
Yusuke: *gasp* Did you get fired?   
  
Hiei: No, people stopped dying, so the cemetery had to go out of business...   
  
All: *hang heads*   
  
Jin: Oooh! There's a nickel in the floor!   
  
Agi: Anyway, what they didn't know was that the Evil Queen was making her way through the forest at that very moment. She maneuvered through the mass of trees with incredible stealth and agility...   
  
Karasu: *chases a porcupine* Must. Prick. FINGERS!!   
  
Agi: She arrived at the dwarves' home and disguised herself as a helpless old lady...carrying a sledgehammer...   
  
Yusuke: *goes to the door* Why hello there helpless old lady. You sure look old and helpless today.   
  
Karasu: *swings hammer* YIYIYIYIYIYI!!!   
  
Yusuke: I know that battle cry! It was started way back in primitive times when man first experienced constapation, and was passed down through the generations to...   
  
*5 hours later...*   
  
Yusuke: ...who taught it to Julius Caesar who taught it to Albert Einstein who taught it to the Evil Queen who...*GASP!* THE EVIL QUEEN!   
  
Karasu: *half asleep* O_@ Huh? What?   
  
Yusuke: EEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKK!!!! *runs into the house*   
  
Karasu: *looks at the hammer* Oh yeah! *chases Yusuke*   
  
Yusuke: *runs around screaming*   
  
Hiei: What the hell is wrong with you?   
  
Kuwabara: Ooh! Ooh! Charades! Hmm...one word...starts with "AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!" Wait...don't tell me! I can get this!   
  
Kurama: I think he's trying to tell us there's trouble...   
  
Kuwabara: Ohhh...*walks up to Yusuke* What is it girl? Is Timmy stuck in the well again?   
  
Jin: *colors on the walls* Weee! ^^   
  
Karasu: *stomps down the hallway* FE FI FO ZAMBONI! I'll get you Snow White! ...You little jerk!   
  
Kurama: Quick! Let's hide him somewhere!   
  
Hiei, Kurama, Jin & Kuwabara: *shove Yusuke in the refrigerator*   
  
Karasu: *comes in* Ok! WHERE IS SHE?!   
  
Hiei: Uhh...she went to...Mexico?   
  
Karasu: ........DRAT! *runs out*   
  
Kurama: Wow. Surprised he fell for that O_o   
  
Kuwabara: *opens the fridge* Umm...Urameshi? *poke* You okay?   
  
Yusuke: *trapped in a block of ice*   
  
Kurama: Not good...   
  
Agi: And so, the beautiful Snow White died. The dwarves mourned the loss...   
  
Jin: Who wants cupcakes?   
  
Hiei, Kurama & Kuwabara: ME! MEEE!!!   
  
Agi: Even the forest creatures gathered to pay their respects...   
  
Plastic Reindeer: *falls over*   
  
Agi: But then along came a prince who had a way to break Snow White's curse thingy and bring her back to life...   
  
All: ............   
  
Agi: Don't tell me there's no prince either.   
  
Lepracy: *runs up with the sledgehammer and smashes the block of ice*   
  
Yusuke: *gets up* I'm...freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...   
  
Agi: And so they all lived happily ever after and died eventually.   
  
All: .......   
  
Agi: THE END! ^_^   
  
  
  
Karasu: *rows a canoe across a cornfield* I'll get to Mexico no matter what it takes! Or...maybe it was Switzerland...o_O   
  
*A porcupine runs by*   
  
Karasu: SQUEE! *chases*   
  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Weeee! This is my favorite one so far ^_^ Oh yes, and thanks once again for the reviews! They're much appreciated! ^^ 


	7. Humpty Dumpty

** Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales  **   
  
  
** Chapter 7: **   
  
Humpty Dumpty A.K.A. The Case of the Missing Face   
  
  
---   
  
  
This is gonna be a very short chapter. The next time I was planning on updating was Christmas (with a Christmas story...thing), but I didn't wanna go that long without adding another chapter. So here, feel the wrath of ten minutes of my day XD  
  
Oh, and do any of you have a livejournal?? I'd love to be friends ^^ (My username's **cyreen** ^_^).   
  
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Agi: PLASTERRRRRRRRRRRRR! GOD BLESS YOUR CABBAGE!  
  
Hiei: You seem bored...  
  
Agi: *falls rigidly on the floor* Foof.  
  
Jin: *dances with a baseball bat*  
  
Agi: Who's up for a SING-A-LONG?!  
  
All: ..........  
  
Agi: M-I-C~ K-E-Y~ M-O-U-S-E!  
  
All: O_o  
  
Agi: MICKEY MOUSE!  
  
Jin: *joins in* Praise the Lord!  
  
Agi: MICKEY MOUSE!  
  
Jin: Halleluiah!  
  
Yusuke: Ok STOP.  
  
Agi & Jin: M-I-C~~~ K-E--  
  
Yusuke: *grabs the baseball bat and whacks them with it*  
  
Agi & Jin: TT____TT  
  
Hiei: Wow...there was an annoying screeching sound in my ears a few seconds ago, but it's gone now...how strange...  
  
Agi: -_____-+ Fine. If you don't wanna put up with my singing, you're going in another fairy tale.  
  
All: O_O *run*  
  
Agi: TOO LATE! *lassos them* YEE-HAW!  
  
Karasu: *sigh* So what are we doing now?  
  
Agi: Hmmm...I KNOW! *rips Lepracy out of Karasu's hair*  
  
Karasu: X_X  
  
Agi: We can do Humpty Dumpty! And Lepracy can be the star!  
  
Kurama: But that's a nursery rhyme...  
  
Agi: Hmmm...*examines Lepracy* I could have SWORN it was a leprachaun...  
  
Kurama: -_-;;;  
  
  
  
Agi: *clears throat* Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall...  
  
Lepracy: *slithers back into Karasu's hair*  
  
Yusuke: *points and laughs* Looks like you're the wall! XDDD  
  
Karasu: -____-;;;;;;;  
  
Agi: Humpty Dumpty had a--  
  
Kuwabara: *rushes in* Somebody help me!!  
  
Agi: ...What on earth do you want? I'm in the middle of expressing myself here...  
  
Kuwabara: It's an emergency!  
  
Agi: You're ruining my fic...  
  
Hiei: No, wait. This is gonna be a good one. *turns to Kuwabara* What is it boy?  
  
Kuwabara: I CAN'T FIND MY FACE!!!!  
  
All: .........?  
  
Hiei: Told you...  
  
Kuwabara: I just had it when I was looking in the mirror, and when I turned away, it was GONE!  
  
Agi: *sigh* Anyway, Humpty Dum--  
  
Kuwabara: Aren't you gonna help me look for it?! TT_TT  
  
Agi: Wow. That's a tough choice. Sitting here absent-mindedly typing random words, or help Kuwabara find his...face.  
  
Kuwabara: Please? *puppy-dog eyes* ;_;  
  
Agi: Humpty Dumpty had a great--  
  
Kuwabara: FINE THEN! *sniffle* I'll look for it all by myself! I'll search the entire closet, braving harsh conditions and vicious wild sweaters. But one day, mark my words, I WILL FIND MY--  
  
*A herd of Eskimos rush in and grab Kuwabara and zoom away on their flying saucer*  
  
Kurama: O_o? What just happened?  
  
Agi: Kuwabara said he had to run to the supermarket to get some dynamite. He'll be back next chapter.  
  
Yusuke: But I could've sworn I just saw--  
  
Agi: NO YOU DIDN'T!!!  
  
All: o.o  
  
Agi: ANYWAY........HUMPTY. FRIGGEN'. DUMPTY...fell into a firey chasm deep in the exotic jungles of Scotland. THE END.  
  
All: ...?  
  
Hiei: What ever happened to the part where we try putting him back together but end up failing miserably?  
  
Agi: Oh yeah. That died too.  
  
Hiei: ...  
  
Lepracy: *licks Karasu's hair*  
  
Karasu: Grrrrr...GET OFF MY HEAD DEMON!! *yanks on Lepracy*  
  
Jin: *hops around* One potato, Two potato, Three potato, MUFFIN! ^^  
  
Yusuke: Wait...so...is this over...already?  
  
Agi: *pulls a bowl of batteries out of the oven* FOOD'S DONE!  
  
Karasu: I'm confused o_O What did any of this have to do with Humpty Dumpty?  
  
Agi: Shut up and eat your slop! *shoves a handful of batteries in Karasu's mouth*  
  
*5 trillion light years away in Alaska...*  
  
Kuwabara: *floats around on an iceberg* I'LL FIND YOU FACE! *looks in the water* THERE YOU ARE! *dives in* COLD! 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
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Yeah...short. Just felt like posting something between now and Christmas. So, sorry if that sucked XD 


	8. Agi's Reincarnation

**Yu Yu Hakusho Fairy Tales **

**Chapter 8: **

Agi's Reincarnation A.K.A. More Madness, Pants, Evil Schemes to Overthrow the Authoress, and Still No Plot. 

--- 

I'll warn you all...this is a pointless chapter. This is just to let everyone know that I'll still continue to update this fic. So I threw this bit together because I didn't know what else to do at the moment :D 

Also, I never thought this fic would get so popular considering...I'm writing it XD I know I've probobly kept a lot of you in suspense for so long...but thanks for not sending any death threats my way (even though I deserved them). And thanks to everyone that's left a review. What really made me want to continue this was how much you guys seemed to enjoy it I LOVE YOU ALL! XD

Ack, and apparently something is screwed up with FF's uploading ways of EVIL. So sorry if some of the punctuation is screwed up. I'd fix it, but I CAN'T! -stabs chair-

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Agi: -comes bounding into (insert current setting here)-

All: O.O

Yusuke: -points- Oh my God! You're alive!

Agi: -sniffs armpits- Yes...it appears I am...of the living...

Kurama: Umm...where have you been all this time? We've had to ward off angry readers for nearly a year. -twitch- A YEAR I TELL YOUUUU! All our efforts for NOTHING! All our spoons...GONE!

Hiei: Kurama, I think you better sit down before you hurt yourself.

Agi: I know what will help him! ...........HEAD! SHOULDERS! KNEES AND TOES!

All: O.o

Jin: Knees and toes!

Yusuke: -whacks Jin with a plunger-

Agi: And eyes and ears and mouth and...LIVER!

Kurama: ........Wow. I think my sinuses have just cleared up.

Yusuke: Wait...You still haven't explained why you haven't updated in so long...

Hiei: She couldn't have. Not if she was locked in the drearyest vertical file in the darkest corner of the library...-hums-

Yusuke: Oh. ...Wait a minute...what? o.O

Hiei: Her making us eat batteries was the last straw. ...I COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! -curls up into a ball-

Kuwabara: -pokes Hiei-

Hiei: -RECOIL- x.x

Kurama: Well, I guess that would explain there being no updates in nearly a year...

Yusuke: At least we were saved from months of torture.

All: -nod in agreement-

Kuwabara: -tries to lick his elbow-

Kurama: Hmmm...but how did she get out?

Hiei: Somebody must have been researching something between Macaroni and Mad Cow Disease.

Karasu: -runs in- -has no pants on- -points at everyone- INFIDELS!

All: O.o;;;

Agi: -whips out clipboard and writes 'BOXERS' next to Karasu's name-

Yusuke: Umm...Karasu...?

Karasu: -shoves a hand in Yusuke's face- HUSH MORTAL! I am not Karasu...I am Mandy! The pantless FIEND! -jumps up on the table and makes menacing gurgling noises-

All: ........

Kuwabara: I enjoy cows!

Karasu: You there! -points to Kuwabara-

Kuwabara: ...WHERE?!

Karasu: You are wearing pants...

Kuwabara: ...WHERE?!

Karasu: PANTED BEAST! -tackles Kuwabara and rips his pants off- LEAVE THIS LAND! -throws pants out the window-

Kuwabara's pants: I'm FREEEEEE! Free to make my mark in the world of ASTROPHYSICS! Mwaha...MWAHAHAHA---lands in a dumpster-

_Down on the street below..._

Little Boy: -runs up to the pants in the dumpster- Look mommy! Fabricated leg casings!

Mother: -violently swats the little boy in the head- No! Don't touch it! It's got GERMS!

_Anyway..._

Kuwabara: -looks down- O.O! I HAVE LEGS!

Karasu: -turns to a nearby potted plant- YOUR MAJESTY! -bows before the plant- I have rid your kingdom of the enemy...it has gone...GONE to another realm!

Kurama: o.O Was he locked up in the library too?

Karasu: -struts over and drapes arms over Kurama's shoulders- Just shut up and frisk me, Horace! -sways-

Kurama: OO;;;;;;

Jin: I feel like breaking out into song!

Hiei: Dont...you...dare.

Jin: T.T

Agi: ...I WANT POP-TARTS! -scampers off to the kitchen and noticesthe empty void the toaster once occupied- Umm...what happened to the toaster??

Kuwabara: It was sacrificed.

Agi: O.o?! ...WHY?!

Kuwabara: Yes.

Agi: ...

Kurama: -still being enticed by Karasu- Umm...guys...HELP!!!

Karasu: -strokes Kurama's hair lovingly- Don't fret my sweet...

Kurama: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Agi: Sooo...anyone have an idea for the next fairy tale?

Kurama: Can't you guys see I'm having a near-death experience here?! ;-;

Hiei: How 'bout the one where we tie you up mercilessly and WE do the narrating...

Yusuke: I like that idea...

Hiei and Yusuke: -look of EVIL PLOTTING-

Agi: ...NO! You can't! Only I can control this fic! ONLY I HAVE THE POWAH!

Hiei and Yusuke: -move in closer-

Agi: -brandishes rubber duck STAY BACK!-

Yusuke: You owe it to us for leaving us stranded here for so long...

Agi: -points duck at Hiei- That was Shorty's fault!

Hiei: GRRRRR! -tackle-

Yusuke: -joins the brawl-

Jin: -Riverdance-

Agi: AAAAH! OWWW! Oooo...that tickles... ACK! NOOO! I'M WARNING YOUUUUU! YOU BETTER NOT--

_STATIC_

Mysterious Voice: Ah yes...Agi sure has gotten herself into quite a mess this time...-cackles- Will Yusuke and Hiei ever be able to conquer her? Will Kurama ever free himself from the clutches of Karasu? Will there ever be free muffins for all?! ...-sniff- ...-sniff sniff- OH GRACIOUS! I LEFT THE OVEN ON! -screams and fades into the distance-

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There. After almost a year, this has finally been updated -smiles triumphantly- :D Anyway, the usual fairy tale madness shall continue next chapter!


End file.
